We have love stories in the Torah. We read of Jacob’s love for Rachel, and Leah’s love for Jacob. Isaav loves Rivkah, as well as his food. We even have Shechem’s love for Dina!
We have fathers loving their sons (Avraham-Yitzchak, Yitzchak-Esau, Jacob-Joseph, etc.). And brothers – Joseph and Benjamin – who love each other.
Later in the Torah, we read of servants who love their masters, and the commandment that each of us must love each other as we love ourselves.
And we have G-d’s love for the Jewish people, of course, starting with our forefathers, and continuing on (D. 4:37), and our reciprocating love for G-d.
But love is not necessarily present in all relationships! Moshe, who dedicated his life to serving G-d and elevating the people, has a decidedly … pragmatic home life, does he not?
To start with, Moshe does not fall in love with Tzipporah at the well (as Yaakov had with Rachel). Instead, after Moshe helps at the well, that seems to be the end of it – until Yisro instructs his daughters to go out and bring the man back! Yisro had seven daughters, and having a man around the house was clearly a benefit.
It all seems quite sensible. Which might explain why Tzipporah separates from Moshe when she realizes that his newfound mission was going to relegate her to a mere afterthought. She had not, after all, been at the Burning Bush, and she had not been asked whether she was willing to “buy in” to Moshe’s quest. The ground rules of the relationship changed underneath her, and Tzipporah acted to protect herself.
Is this a misreading?
Is This The Price Moshe Pays?
And there arose not a prophet … like Moshe, whom the Lord knew face to face. (D. 34:10)
Moshe’s connection to G-d after Sinai meant that he was never intimate with Tzipporah after Sinai. And because Tzipporah seemingly arrived just before Sinai, is it possible that the last time that Moshe and Tzipporah were properly Husband and Wife was before the Burning Bush?!
Which means that the relationship with G-d essentially forced Tzipporah out of being Moshe’s full wife, does it not?!
Does Moshe’s commitment to G-d mean that he pays the price in not having a proper marriage, and not being able to invest in his own children?
Is this why we don’t aspire to having a marriage like Moshe and Tzipporah, just as, as much as we admire Avraham and Isaac, we don’t aspire to experiencing anything like the Akeidah?
We know that Moshe willingly offers his life for the people many times. There was nobody more committed to others than Moshe. Nobody more committed to G-d’s vision for the future of the Jewish people.
Was the cost to Moshe’s family life necessary?
Does being that kind of leader necessarily come with that kind of price?